Bambi isn't just a Disney Character

I wasn't going to do this, I thought about it, but I wasn't going to do this. Now, you made me do this!

At dinner the other night I heard a tale about an old flame of Mr. DD. Of course he's madly in love with my good friend DD, even after 18? years of marriage (lots of softball), but he clearly has a soft spot for his old flame. Her name was Bambi. I know, I know what you're thinking, but there was a really good reason that her mother named her Bambi. Bambi's mother was involved in a terrible auto accident while she was pregnant, she almost lost her own life, and the life of her unborn daughter. It seems that there is a biblical/Hebrew meaning for the word Bambi - "miracle of God". Bambi seemed the most fitting name in the situation.
You may be wondering what happened in the accident. It was rather tragic. She was driving down the highway late at night and...she hit a deer.

My lawyers are on vacation.

A snooze button

Wow. It seems I have a stalker, er, fan. A few days go by without a post, and suddenly my inbox is full of people (er, person) demanding that I get back to the blog! Relax Jack'sMom, here I am.

The reason I have been away is because I have been concentrating on getting my family into the new routine I outlined in a previous post. It is working quite nicely too, with just a few kinks needing to be ironed out. For instance, now that the cherubs all go to bed nice and early they now wake up...nice and early. I know, I know, that was the point. However, now that they get up early, I have to get up early! Argh. Anyone who knows me knows that I don't do early. (whoever coined the phrase "nice" and early was a moron)For the past five years I have arranged for my whole brood to not stir before 8AM, I don't accept calls before 9AM, this is widely known. Now, I have painted myself into a corner, so to speak. I want and need the cherubs in bed early, so therefore I must adjust to waking up at 6:30AM.
Last night I decided I would retire early myself. I was in my bed at 8PM - but then I started reading. The book I was reading is marvelous, and I couldn't put it down until 10PM. Then, to sweeten things, it seems that Paddy Boy is now teething boy. (About time, he's 8 mos. old as of Friday and he has no fangs!) He was up multiple times during the night and he was quite inconsolable unless I was running my finger across his gums. (I should have had a little Jameson on my finger, I know) Curly girl then got up and decided to come into our room. Before you know it, hubby's alarm was going off, and there was first son staring me in the face asking "what are we going to do today Mom? Argh. Why don't kids come with a snooze button?
The reason for beginning this early to bed scheme is that the kindergarten bus comes at 7:30AM, which means that First son needs to be up between 6:30 and 6:45, in order to have a healthy breakfast and start his day. The kicker is that we are now considering starting the whole homeschooling thing this year, and not sending him to kindergarten. Alas, nothing has been decided yet and so I must err on the side of caution and get his bones and mine - ready to go - "nice and early".

Much Better Today

Ok, So yesterdays post was a little, um, well, let's just say emotional. Today was much better. It's amazing what a good night's sleep can do for ya! That, plus the hours I spent agonizing over ways to improve the outcome of my days. Here's some of what I have come up with:

1. Schedule - it is imperative that we implement and adhere to (is that redundant?) a schedule, one for the mornings, one for the evenings. Well, hubby and I have already discussed and begun implementing an evening routine, because we need to get First son and his mother ready to catch that 7:30 am bus that will be pulling up out front in a little over a month!
Dinner is at 6PM or earlier, but not later. Immediately following dinner are baths. 10 minute time limit in the tub, and hair washing is mandatory. Upstairs, jammied, and reading a story by 7PM, asleep by 7:30. So far, it's going ok, with the exception of asleep by 7:30, but I know that that will come with time. We really have to be strict with ourselves about keeping this schedule with very little exception. Especially in the beginning.
Today I started a morning "routine" which consists of, bathroom (my kids esp, Curly, need to be reminded to go to the bathroom), breakfast, fang scrubbing, clothes, make beds/straighten-up bedroom. Then, Mom's errands, which leaves the rest of the day open for playing. Since this was only the first day I can't comment on progress yet!

2. Nutrition - Usually we are pretty good with eating a balanced diet and not letting the kids have too much sugar, but it needs to be more of a priority. I find that first son especially is a little off kilter when he hasn't eaten properly. Yesterday he had a bag of Goldfish for breakfast, ice cream for lunch (at VBS,- I wouldn't have given him ice cream for lunch!), and a bowl of honey nut cheerios for snack - (at a friend's - I don't stock sugar cereal) - so no wonder that by the time dinner rolled around he was off the wall! Today was much better - He had a bowl of oatmeal and a glass of OJ before VBS, then a Jelly sandwich on WW (is mine the only kid on the planet who doesn't like PB?), a plum, some apple juice, an ice cream bar ( hey, we were at the pool, and he had eaten his whole lunch, plus fruit!) Then I have implemented another new part of our schedule - the 4:30PM snack - today it was 1/4 of a green pepper and some baby carrots with ranch dip. Both kids gobbled it up and then - miracle - did not bug me every two minutes till dinner that they were "hungy". Extra bonus - they then ate their whole dinners - MacNCheese, chicken spring roll, and green beans with a big old glass of milk! Curly even asked for seconds! In sharp contrast to yesterday, today I may actually qualify for MOTY, I count 5 servings of fruit/veg!

3. No computer for Mom until after the kids are asleep! - this one is tough, but it will probably make a big difference.

4. Get Hubby on board for all of the above! Good thing he checks my blog frequently!

This isn't everything, but it is a start. I mean the one thing I definitely figured out yesterday is that some changes need to be made. I don't want to have to call Nanny Jo to come fix my problems!

Woe is me

Attention: This post is at best, melancholy. You have been warned.

Tonight is not a good night. I am feeling monumentally sad, dissatisfied with myself, and with my abilities as a mother and a wife. Basically, I suck. I have been fighting these feelings for a long time now. Months at least. I have been trying really hard to keep myself distracted, and for a while especially with the hub-bub of the nuptials, it was working, but now that has worn off. I can't put my finger on any one thing, there are so many things that upset me.

Tonight I just really don't like myself. I am not being the kind of mother I want to be. Today, I am really tired. I don't really have the luxury of being tired, with 3 little ones in the house, but today, I am tired. When I am tired I have no patience. I yell. A lot. I threaten. I am cranky and I am mean. It is not the cherubs' fault that I am tired. It is my fault. So why then do I take it out on them? Because obviously, I am a lousy mother.

I had this thought tonight, as I was holding Paddy boy, I flashed back to when First son was in my arms as a new baby. I realized that as I held my firstborn baby back then, and dreamed of the wonderful life we would have together as mother and child, none of my fantasies contained the types of rage and anger that I was displaying today and tonight. No matter how much good I do, however loving and cuddling and adoring a mother I am most of the time, I know that I erase that with just a minute's worth of mean Mommy.

Don't get me wrong, as much as the cherubs are indeed angelic, they are also quite mischievous and have lately been pushing the envelope on "fresh". Still, I am the grown-up, and sometimes I don't act like it.

Please don't write me any comments about stuff I already know. I am being hard enough on myself tonight. If you have something constructive or supportive to say however, I could use it.

Re-evalutaing Friendships

So last night hubby and I went out to a lovely dinner with some very close friends to celebrate her birthday. Yes, we sprung for a babysitter and all! The restaurant was good, the decor was lovely, homey, and welcoming. The service was just OK,our waitress was working the whole room alone, with just one 12 year old bus-boy, and I don't think the restaurant expected or prepared for what turned out to be a Tuesday night rush, so I won't hold it against them. The food was mostly good - baked clams C-, filet mingon A+. The only real negative is that the restaurant was very LOUD. Sometimes it was hard to hear each other speak. Alas, the acoustical issues of the restaurant are not to blame for what I am about to tell you.

As a gift for the birthday girl, I had gotten a lovely necklace with a silver claddagh which lays over a beautiful, shiny white disc. After the gift was opened we were all admiring it, and a discussion began about the white disc, namely exactly what it was made of. It went like this:
Someone: "is that mother of pearl?"
Me: "I thought it was Capis Shell"
Her: "Appolonia?"
Me: giggle
Him: "What did you say?"
Me: "I said I thought it was Capis Shell"
Her: "Is that what it is? Appolonia?"
Me: giggle, and then, in my best bad Italian accent,
" Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Wednesday"
Them: Blank stares
Me: "What do you think it is?" (maybe I hadn't heard right)
Her: "Appolonia"
Me: "Monday Tuesday, Thursday, Wednesday"
Them: nothing

I think I have to reevaluate this friendship. I don't know if I can be friends with people who don't regularly quote Godfather scenes and work them into everyday conversation, or at the very least, appreciate it when others do. Do they even realize that Appolonia is one of the most tragic characters in the entire trilogy? Think how different Michael's life as Don would have been if Appolonia hadn't been blown to bits, forcing him to return to the arms of the very "naive" Kay? Michael needed a good Italian wife to stay home and have the babies and stir the gravy, not some New England Wasp with the arrogance to think her own thoughts!
Well, at least we have Buffalo.

Graffiti

There is something funky going on. Apparently the white trash lovers read my blog.
This morning as I left my house at the un-godly hour of 8:50am (yes, I am in BIG trouble come Sept, when First son needs to catch the bus at 7:30!) - I found, on the fence that runs along my property, graffiti! Some low-life imbecile decided to leave his "tag" on my rotten old stockade fence. Boy am I mad. I dropped First Son off at VBS ( a whole 'nother post), and promptly summoned Suffolk County's finest to the old homestead to survey the damage. They filed a report, assured me that it was good that I called so that if they ever catch this guy they will have more evidence to throw at him, and said they would patrol my area more often. Woo. Hoo.
Honestly, I didn't expect them to do much, but I will not sit silently and let anyone vandalize my property. (well, mine and Washington Mutual's that is)
Hubby came home early and got right out there with the power washer and took the paint right off. The funny thing is, that after he power washed it, that section of fence of course looked much cleaner and newer and nicer than all the other sections alongside it. A conundrum you say? Not for my hubby. Apparently he has been reading my MS Living. He put on his creative thinking cap, and took a handful of mud and re"stained" the fence for us! What, you didn't think he would have power-washed the whole thing did you? LOL. Me neither.
Well, we'll see what happens tomorrow.

Nosy Neighbors

You know that old saying about kissing by the garden gate? "the flowers may be blind, but the neighbors ain't"? Well, guess what? I am the neighbor they speak of! Now, it's not that I am inherently nosy, (well, ok, yes I am), but , let's be reasonable, If you decide to have a full blown, 100 decibel, lover's spat outside my bedroom window at 3Am, you can bet your ass I am going to pull up a chair.

There I was last night enjoying my sweet slumber when I was awoken by some such lover's quarrel. So out of my bed I stumbled and over to the window. There they were in the middle of the street, F-bombs flying. I kneel down, bad back and all and settle in for a show!

He says: "don't hit me! mumble mumble, you know, mumble mumble, my father, mumble"

She says, and no mumbling here, :"I'm tired of this 'don't hit me, my father used to hit me' bullshit - your father didn't f-ck you did he?!"

Me - O MY GOD (silent thought - he didn't did he??) !

Hubby then lifts his head to ask what the heck I am doing -

Me - "shh! go make me some popcorn! "

Seriously the bickering and the pushing and shoving and "I love you so much and you know it, that's why you f-ck with me" and the "all you care about is getting laid" - he said to her!, and the "just take me home and then you can go wherever you want" - it all went on for about 2 hours.

Now, I don't live anywhere near a bar or anything, none of my neighbors were having a party, I don't know how these poor souls came to decide that the street immediately outside my bedroom window would make the perfect venue for their row, but it was quite entertaining, I just wish I could TiVo that kind of drama and watch it at a more convenient time.

Hubby may now expect me to wake up in the middle of the night for other things...

like feeding Paddy boy. But, I have a bad back, you know.

It's terrible to get old...

I can remember when I was little, big people saying "it is terrible to get old", usually in response to some ache or pain they were experiencing. Well, having passed the threshold of 30, and not having any child in my womb at the moment on whom to blame my aches and pains, I whole heartedly concur. It is terrible to get old.

Yesterday as I was going about my business , cleaning and cooking, and mommying, a terrible thing happened. As I bent down to pick up the bucket of Playdoh that the cherubs had been playing with earlier, I heard a "Pop", followed by an awful burning sensation spreading through my lower back. I looked First son in the eyes and said "uh oh". I threw out my back. Next thing you know I am lying face down on the very dirty kitchen floor, writhing in pain. I had just put poor Paddy Boy down on said floor with a spoon and a bowl to bang on, when I got the bright idea to tidy up. Thank goodness we grow them big here on our farm, and First son was able to reach and dial the phone. He called Grandma and said "could you come over? Mommy's on the kitchen floor and she can't get up" Thank goodness too, that MIL is just a block away. She was here in no time to save the day, or at least to save Paddy boy from his own dirty diapers.

After a few minutes and much wincing I was able to pull myself to a semi-erect position. Hubby got me an appointment with a chiropractor and came home from work early. Dr. Back-cracker took his sweet time, but did eventually x-ray my frame. Guess what? I have an extra vertebrate which is fused on my left side to my sacrum, a congenital anomaly, but, not in the least bit related to my pain. This diagnosis was just a door prize. The good Doc decided that I was in way too much pain for a full exam and so treated me with some electric shock therapy and advised lots of ice. He said that if I was 50% better in the morning to come see him again. (I thought you were supposed to go back to the Dr. if you don't feel better, but what do I know).

Today I am walking without having to constantly lean on something or someone, which is a huge improvement. I still can't lift Paddy boy though, which is heartbreaking. MIL was a lifesaver again, as she took the whole brood for the day.

Tomorrow should be better, please God. I am really not good at being an invalid. I stink at letting people do things for me. I can only watch so much daytime TV and IO movies. I am all caught up on my Redbook, MS Living and have been dipping into hubby's Nat'l Geographic (Malaria is baaad!) Curly girl is totally taking advantage because she knows I can't throw her over my shoulder and march her up to her bed, and poor First son is so bored, he wishes he still had preschool!! Please, please, please let me be young again tomorrow!

The Miss is a Mrs!

OK loyal fans, here I am, back in the game. The storm has passed. The niece is now officially Mrs. V, and is currently soaking up the sun and sights in Hawaii, little bitch! LOL. The wedding and all the festivities surrounding it were a huge success! Seriously, the wedding was awesome. All of the details that we worked so hard on really had impact. The cake was gorgeous, the bride was gorgeous, let's just say it, I was gorgeous! The bad rocked - and they even played Guns n' Roses, just for me! How'd they know? The relatives flew in, and flew out. There was singing and dancing and a little bit of imbibing. (just a little) I gave a toast, and though I was quite frightened, I actually caused a few tears, (the good kind, I think) The little cherubs, who everybody always wants to rent out for their wedding because they are so cute, well, let's just say that if I had rented them for this wedding, I would have wanted my money back!! They were of course adorable, but First son had a total meltdown half way down the aisle, and Curly was just so concerned for her brother (I think they might actually share a rib) that she went running off to find him. There are NO pictures of the bridal party with both First son and Curly. By the time we got to pictures the ring bearer was a little better, but the flower girl was too tired. She actually slept for an hour and a half in the bridal suite, with a tablecloth for a blanket!! The nap did her wonders though, as she then danced the night away!
The party or "Par tee" as Miss Suzy Mac would say, went on until the wee hours - literally, the bride didn't go to bed till half past 5AM!!! I myself made it to about 4, but then, I was just lucky to be there among all the youngsters!!
I am both sad and glad at the same time. I am sad that it has all come and gone, but I am also glad that it is finally over! Now I can get my life back for a little! Wait! What am I talking about? Mickey D and the Sunshine girl are getting married in just 10 months and 27 days!!! I gotta get to work!! Weddings are after all a hobby of mine, or so says the hubby!