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Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Welcome Baby Banana


Somewhat akin to my pal Jerry Seinfeld's diatribe about taking and then keeping reservations, I would like to point out that if you are going to take a message you must then give the message.

My very good friend Chiquita had been expecting her second child, a girl, to arrive via scheduled c-section on the 23rd of this month. Chiquita and I go way back, almost 20 years. We have shared every one of life's most magical and most tragic moments together since then. We have rejoiced together about prom dates, college graduations, engagements, pregnancies, and new jobs. We created and adhered to our own life motto of "no regrets", which went hand in hand with "summer rule". We were each other's bridesmaids. We also helped each other through breakups, college disasters, marriage troubles and the way too early deaths of our parents. Although we each have blood sisters, we are, in the truest sense, soul sisters making our way through this life together.

Just over two years ago I sat in a hospital room with my very frightened friend as she prepared to face the outcome of breaking her water - 6 weeks before her due date. I arrived at the hospital to offer support, humor, and love; and hoping to hide the absolute fear that had all but paralyzed me. Maybe it was because she had sat with me just 8 weeks earlier on the floor of my bedroom and cried with me as I mourned the child who had died in my womb at just 12 weeks gestation, but I think that it would have been important to me to be there with her even if she hadn't. I listened intently as the doctor explained the medical reasons that a c-section delivery the next morning offered the best prognosis. Then I talked with my friend and tried to prepare her as best I could for a surgical birth (having experienced it twice myself), and for the very real possibility of leaving the hospital without a baby in her arms. We talked for a long time.

A few days later I stood by her as she kissed her new baby "goodbye for now" in the NICU and then , when she was done wiping away her tears, I drove her to her baby shower where she got to do the surprising instead of being the surprised. Praise God, just a week after that I stayed with her mother in law and prepared the house for the homecoming of a perfectly healthy, if somewhat tiny, baby boy. I was so honored when she let me hold him and change him, and I will never forget (or let him forget) how teeny tiny was his heiney.

This past Friday I drove over to Chiquita's house to sit and enjoy a cup of tea, watch our sons play together (it was the day I drove Chiquita to her baby shower that I learned about Paddy boy's impending arrival! Our 2 boys are just less than 9 months apart), and once again sit and talk about what it was going to be like. This time she would be bringing home a full term baby, and a girl at that (kind of a major thing for us members of the motherless daughters club, becoming mothers of daughters...). I brought her some magazines and lip balm for the hospital. Basically I was just trying to let her know without saying so that she is important to me, and that I am here for her, my soul sister.

So..imagine how I felt when, come Monday morning my sister, Aunt Mean called from work asking why I hadn't been in touch with Chiquita. Aunt Mean is an RN in the NICU at the hospital where Chiquita delivers, in fact she took care of Chiquita's son when he was born. Immediately I knew- she had the baby! (She wasn't scheduled for another 10 days, but as I have mentioned before, God doesn't use a calendar) Apparently, Chiquita and Mr. Chiquita had been trying desperately to get in touch with me. I had left my cell phone in the back of my beach chair, so I didn't even check for missed calls. I was at work all day Sunday, Hubby was home. I immediately hung up with Aunt Mean and dialed my voicemail, but no message. Strange, I thought. I called my dear Hubby and asked if he had gotten any calls the day before, or had he listened to any messages. He said "umm...", so I asked specifically about messages from Chiquita. More "umm..." then finally "I think so". What do you mean you think so??? For crying out loud, if you take a message you need to then give the message!!

I am so sorry, my dear Chiquita. I married a wonderful man who is a terrible secretary.

Last night I got to hold the new little Miss "MES", even if I was a day late. She is perfect. I held her in my arms, hiding out in the hospital room for a good 1/2 hour past the end of visiting time. I cuddled her and whispered sweet nothings into her tiny little ears. She is my little banana now, and I will forever be her melon.

3 comments:

Cara said...

So glad you got to see her! DH may be a lousy secretary but he does look pretty cute in a chef's hat and apron!

Anonymous said...

did you fire the secretary? Welcome lil'banana! Your a great friend, Im lucky to have you as mine. Do you have time to cry on my floor?
J's Mom

Anonymous said...

Baby Banana is indeed beautiful, I was aware of her arrival because I saw her equally beautiful brother with one of his aunts in the hallway and did a double take!! Who could mistake that adorable little man. Congrats to Chiquita and mr Chiquita, I do have a request of the blog master, please change my moniker, I am not Mean, even though first son did call me Aunt Mean when he was just a tot, but now I need a new tag!!!

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