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Tuesday, October 27, 2009

I Will Find Joy


This has been my mantra of late. I don't know where it came from, but it has been playing over and over in my head. It is true, my life right now is nothing that I ever thought it would be. It is nothing short of a nightmare. In a million years I never thought I would be googling "divorce mediation". I never pictured myself packing an overnight bag for my kids to spend the night with their father. I am living in bizarro world. It's weird, uncomfortable and I don't like it. It is a work in progress though, and while there are a lot of bad days, lately there are some good days too, and for that I am grateful.

Have I mentioned that I have the four most amazing cherubs? They bring so much light to my world, to my life. Every night at least one of them crawls into my bed and shnuggles up close to me. In the past I would have been diligent about shuffling them back to their own beds, but lately I am way too tired, and besides, I like having them there. In the morning we hug and shnuggle, we giggle and talk. They are absolutely delicious, better than cinnamon rolls oozing with sweet gooey frosting. They are my reason for being, they are the ones who make me smile, even make me laugh. My children are my greatest blessing, and in them I will find joy.

2 comments:

Lisa Kennedy said...

Bravo Tricia!

Children are such a blessing--

I have a good friend that went thought something very similar about 15 years ago. Today she has two sons in High School that are great boys. She went to school and got her teaching degree, it took years but she did it. She bought her own town house. Of all her accomplishments her biggest one is that she lives in joy. She is still the same caring, outgoing, open, loving woman I met 18 years ago.

Bravo Tricia!

Cara said...

First. Happy Birthday (what are you now 26??)to you my friend. I wish for you this year new found joys, new paths that lead you to your rainbow. Sometimes our paths take an unexpected turn and how we handle that makes all the difference in the world. Second. I am happy to report that I see a glimmer of my old friend in your post today...I knew she would start to find her way back. Kiss those cherubs for me. ~C

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